The Crumbling Universe
by Goku Yamaguchi
Summary: When the universe falls apart an unlikely duo must work together to make sense of it all and, more importantly, survive!
1. Prolouge

LUKE SKYWALKER took a kick to the gut and flew backwards from it. Hitting the ground, he landed in a puddle. He looked up to see his opponent, half-man but also half-machine, flying up in the air in this shady back alley.

CYBORG jumped in the air. Looking down on his opponent, he wondered how much of a challenge this was going to be. The enemy clearly had some weapons on him; in his hand was a green plasma-sword, and on his belt were small bombs and a gun. Not too different compared to fighting Slade. Then when he landed he felt something hit him. Flying back, he saw that he had been shot by the man's gun- it was a laser rifle. Getting up, he saw his opponent charging towards him. With quick reflexes Cyborg jumped over him. Turning around as quickly as he could he opened his shoulder panels and fired some ion blasts. They were easily blocked by the plasma-sword. Grunting, he tried again. This time was perfect- the unknown man had jumped to get a good attack, but rammed right into the blasts.

Going down from the impact, Luke swiftly got up as R2-D2 beeped at him. _Not now_ _R2_ , Luke thought as he swung his lightsaber at his foe, which had tried to kick him at the same time. The enemy, however, was successful with his timing. Luke took several blows. _Nothing's working_ , Luke angrily thought in his mind. Then he saw what was coming.

Cyborg, clearly winning this impromptu brawl, decided it was time to finish it. Knocking down his foe with more ion blasts, he quickly morphed his arms into cannons and fired. The sonic wave that he fired did the trick, sending his opponent into unconsciousness, but still breathing.

But what caused this to happen?

Let me introduce myself. I am the Storyteller, the sole survivor of a race that was unfortunately wiped out as an early result of the things that happened. I am here to tell you what has occurred, so that it may not happen again. Anytime I say something, it will be underlined to distinguish it from what is going on. Now, here's how it all began.


	2. Chapter 1

DO you remember that fateful day when Chuck Norris refused to play the Sega Saturn? Well, it did not end well. There was an apocalyptic fight, but it didn't just destroy his universe- it broke the Omniverse as well. Every group collided into one main universe, with few known locations. And this is where we begin.

GARFIELD woke up in a strange place. He was still on the pink couch his owner, Jon Arbuckle, had, but the room had visibly changed. It was blue, with white lines running horizontally and vertically. It reminded him of a certain television show he had regularly seen on BBC America. Looking around, he couldn't help but notice the giant purple robot looming in front of him. It must have been as tall as four Garfields, and it was quite muscular. Now Garfield, being the lazy cat he is, naturally wasn't concerned.

"Is it Monday?" he asked.

"PREPARE TO BE ELIMINATED" the robot said.

"Oh yeah, _definitely_ _Monday_."

Before the robot did anything, it soon had a shadowy figure jump on its back and slice its robotic head off. The shadowy figure jumped off and within a few seconds the robot exploded. Unfortunately for the fat orange cat, the explosion disintegrated the couch. Then the shadowy figure walked over.

"Hey!" Garfield yelled, "Jon's going to kill me for that!"

"Well," the figure said with a scruffy voice, "sorry for saving your life."

Then the figure revealed himself. He was tall but hunched over, wearing a yellow-and-blue jumpsuit, and a mask with points on each side. One could not help but notice the sharp, metallic claws on each hand either.

"Hey!" Garfield said in surprise, "I know who you are! You're Hugh Jackman!"

"I don't know who you're talking about," the man said, "but that's _not_ my name."

"Alright alright. So what do you want me to call you?"

"Just call me Wolverine."

"Alright 'Wolverine'. What do you want, and where am I?"

"Funny. I was gonna ask you the same thing."

"Well I have no clue. One minute I'm sleeping at home, my stomach full of lasagna, next thing you know I'm here."

"Lasagna? Oh, you're that fat cat from the newspaper comics."

"Watch it buddy. I'm not fat, I'm big-boned."

"That's not what Jon thinks."

"I know. Hey, speaking of Jon, have you seen him?"

Wolverine shook his head.

"Hmmm. Well, if we're stuck here we might as well do something." Garfield decided.

"Come with me."

" _Excuse me?_ "

"You heard me."

"Yes, I heard you. But the thing is, I just don't go around with random superheroes!"

"How about your days with the Pet Force?"

"That's different."

Wolverine grabbed Garfield and charged at a wall. Upon impact Garfield fell through, leaving Wolverine a very confused mutant. Poking his hand through to test the waters, Wolverine put his head through. He saw a mansion that looked like it hadn't been touched since Professor X was young, and sleeping on the ground was Garfield.

Stepping through, Wolverine poked the cat with his finger.

"Wake up," he grumbled. Garfield slowly opened his eyes.

"Breakfast already?" he asked with a yawn in the middle.

"No, just the same thing as what happened before you fell asleep."

"Oh. Bummer."

Standing up, Garfield looked around, and then he commented, "This place is a dump."

"Hey!" a voice yelled from behind them. Turning to look, they found a short man with a long head in a green shirt and hat with purple overalls. He also had a handlebar mustache and wore white Disney-like gloves.

"Yes, can we help you?" Wolverine asked with a hint of sarcasm.

"Actually you can." the short guy replied, "You can help me by taking that back, you fat cat!"

"Well for that," Garfield started, "I won't!"

"Fine, but I, Luigi the plumber, am warning you…"

"So what?! We can kick your butt any day!"

"Then make it _today_!"


	3. Chapter 2

KNOWING that Garfield may have just screwed them up, Wolverine unleashed his claws, ready to fight. The trio stood for a few seconds in a stare down, and then the fight commenced. The three charged at each other with Garfield jumping as Luigi kicked Wolverine in the gut, which didn't hurt much. Turning to face Garfield, Luigi never saw the kick to the back of the head that he received from Wolverine. As he flew in the air Luigi managed to land a few punches on the mutant as Garfield watched for an opportunity. Wolverine did a backflip as Luigi turned around to hit the orange tabby, and as a result the plumber hit them both. Quickly Wolverine hit back, knocking Luigi down. As the mutant and the plumber traded blows Garfield decided it was the right time to take a nap. Wolverine took a quick glance over.

"Aw, not now!" he grunted in an annoyed tone. Turning back, he started to walk backwards in order to protect the sleeping kitty. The plan backfired as Luigi blasted the both of them with a fireball. Feeling immense heat, Garfield jumped up, yelling in pain. As the fight continued on the duo realized they had gone in too deep. The plumber had barely taken any hits, and, as short and strange looking as he may have been, he could put up a fight. Getting knocked down again, Garfield looked up at the man in green.

"Alright, alright!" Garfield yelled, "I take back everything I said!"

Luigi stood over them, doing nothing.

"Fine," he commented, "I accept your apology. Now get up. Come in."

Getting up, Garfield and Wolverine slowly walked inside the beaten-up mansion. While it was bad on the outside for sure, on the inside it actually wasn't too bad. Walking into what was assumed to be the living room the mutant and the cat noticed several details; there was a fireplace by the wall, some chairs (one of which was a recliner), a couch, and a coffee table. As Luigi went into the kitchen, he turned back to look at his guests who he had just tried to kill several minutes earlier.

"What do you guys want?" he asked.

"Got any lasagna?" Garfield asked.

"Got any beer?" Wolverine added.

"Of course I have lasagna! But… what's beer?"

Wolverine did nothing but just blink at the host. Looking away from the plumber, he grumbled, "Tsk… kids' characters…"

Within about ten minutes Luigi was back in the living room, sipping coffee as Garfield chowed down on the lasagna. Wolverine had declined in his way: slicing the cup in half. As the three sat in the living room Wolverine couldn't help but notice the large painting on the wall; it depicted a woman in a yellow dress with long brown hair.

"Who's the girl?" Wolverine asked.

"Oh," Luigi replied slowly. "That's Princess Daisy. She's my girlfriend. We were quite happy here once I got rid of the ghosts. But when this weird flash occurred a few nights ago, she was gone. I looked everywhere I could reach for her, but she was nowhere to be seen. Come to think of it, I haven't seen my brother Mario anywhere either. Not even Bowser. I wonder where they all went…"

 _Huh_ , thought Wolverine, _This 'flash' happened in a lot of places…_

Wolverine himself remembered when the flash hit him and his allies, the X-Men. They were having one of those fancy dinners when Nightcrawler noticed something out of a window.

"Hey, Professor X," he asked, "What is that?"

Before Charles Xavier could react, however, the flash overtook them; now Wolverine was stuck with a fat tabby cat in the mansion of an Italian plumber, listening to his story of how his whole family basically went missing.

"Look," Wolverine said, getting up, "I'd love to listen to your sob story all day, but we have to go."

"Aw," Garfield said in a sad tone, "but his lasagna is _so good_!"

"I don't care. We're leaving."

"You're right. Jon's probably worried sick about me, and Odie just doesn't give him my level of sarcasm."

"Exactly. That's why we should go."

Garfield sighed. "Fine," was his answer, "but I'm taking your lasagna to go." He told Luigi.

"Take it!" Luigi eagerly smiled, "I've got plenty of it."

Within moments the mutant and the cat were off, with Garfield carrying a huge doggie bag of lasagna.


	4. Chapter 3

As they walked down the road, away from Luigi's mansion, Garfield eagerly munched on the lasagna in the bag. He looked at his companion.

"Y'sure you don't want any?" he asked.

Wolverine looked down at him and said, "Why not. Give me a piece."

Handing the mutant a piece, they silently walked as they ate. Then when he was done, Wolverine began a conversation.

"So," he started, "tell me about this Jon guy."

"Jon? Well, he's not the most normal guy on the block," Garfield began.

 _I know what that's like_ , Wolverine thought in his mind.

"Plus, Jon's terrible at a lot of things. He's bad with women. He's bad with accordions. He's bad with fashion. If it exists, Jon's probably bad at it, unless it's feeding me."

Wolverine let out a little chuckle, and then reached into his pocket for a cigarette. He had none, and this bugged him. To counter his urge, he grabbed another bit of lasagna. Munching on it, he noticed what was coming ahead.

It was a portal. It had a steel-like frame, and it gave off a green glow. Walking up to it, the duo examined it. Wolverine gave it a tap and said, "Yep. Pure adamantium."

Garfield gave a puzzled look and asked, "Adamantium? What's that?"

"Well," Wolverine started, trying to explain it as best as he could, "adamantium is actually what my bones are made of. That's why I have these claws."

"Oh. So… now what do we do?"

Taking another look at the portal, Wolverine gave an answer: "We go through and see where it leads."

"Are you sure? My mother told me to _never_ go through strange portals."

"Your mother said that?"

"Well, no. She always said to never trip the chef when he has muffins in his hands but, y'know, same thing."

"Well, I guess we have no choice."

And with that the two jumped through.

They wound up in a spaceport. Looking around, they saw that they were nowhere near Earth. Then a man in torso armor and goofy-looking tights ran past them, yelling, "He's coming!"

Before the confused duo could react a round pod flew past them, barely missing them. Landing, the pod cooled down and a door opened. Out came a man. He was almost six-feet-tall, wore green torso armor with no "shoulder spikes" and black pants, and had spiky black hair. A green lens covering his eye, he took a look around the room.

"WHERE IS HE?!" he yelled.

Garfield took a look around and asked, "Who?"

"FRIEZA!" The man replied.

"Freezer?" Wolverine asked, "I think it's on top of the refrigerator."

"NO I'M NOT!" a voice yelled. The three unwanted guests turned to look for the source, and there it was; a tall-ish white and purple alien who was bald and had a huge, lizard-like tail.

The alien chuckled at the mutant's joke, however, and continued, "So Bardock, we meet again."

He turned to our heroes. "I see we have some strangers aboard. Let me introduce myself. I am Lord Frieza, ruler of the Planet Trade Organization."

"So basically," Garfield commented, "real estate."

"Well, yes, I guess you could say that." Frieza replied.

"But that's not all!" Bardock yelled, "Frieza is a monster! He destroyed Planet Vegeta and _all_ of its inhabitants!"

Frieza laughed, "Oh that's right. Last time I saw you I thought I had killed you and all of your puny race, save for your brats, that "Prince" Vegeta, and his bodyguard Nappa, as well as some of the ones I might have forgotten."

Bardock looked sternly at him, "Yes, I'm aware. But be ready Frieza! I've gotten stronger, and I'm ready to fight you this time!"

"Hold your horses there, spiky." Wolverine interrupted, "I think we'll take this guy on. He doesn't look so tough."

Bardock looked at them like they had grown seventy-four heads.

"What's the matter? You OK, spiky?"

"Well," Bardock said, "I just had a vision. You guys are going to get your butts handed to you on a silver platter, and then I have to fight him."

"Seems like a valid excuse _not_ to fight." Garfield decided.

"No," Wolverine countered, "this alien guy committed mass genocide. I can't accept that. We're going to fight him, and that's _final_."

"Fine," Garfield groaned, "let's do it."

Frieza smirked and said, "This is going to be too _easy_."

"THAT'S WHAT YOU THINK!" Wolverine yelled, charging forward as Garfield gave chase from behind.


	5. Chapter 4

FRIEZA immediately went on the offensive, kicking Garfield and Wolverine low, as well as hitting them with his tail a few times. Wolverine managed to hit the menace with his claws a few times, but then Frieza caught Garfield with the grip of his tail. Choking the tabby cat a few times, Frieza threw him and then knocked Wolverine down. As the leader of the Planet Trade Organization focused his attention back to the fat cat, the mutant looked for an opportunity; and when he found one, he blew it. Frieza jumped out of the way of Wolverine's diving sneak attack and proceeded to pummel them even more. Knocking the fat cat out, Frieza chuckled as he turned towards the much stronger mutant.

"Y'know," Frieza commented, "I'm always looking for new soldiers for my army."

"Sorry," Wolverine replied, "I don't serve ice cream."

Starting to get annoyed, Frieza looked at his enemy and yelled. "THEN I GUESS YOU'LL HAVE TO DIE!"

Charging at the mutant Frieza went all out and beat up Wolverine to the point of unconsciousness. Before he could be finished off, however, Bardock stepped in.

"FRIEZA! THAT'S ENOUGH!" Bardock yelled. Walking forward, it was apparent that Bardock was serious. "Fight me… I'm the challenge you want."

Frieza laughed even harder than when Bardock told our heroes what happened to Planet Vegeta.

" _You think you can defeat me?! Preposterous!"_ Frieza said between gasps of air, " _You're completely insane!_ "

"Watch me."

Almost immediately Bardock charged forwards, but Frieza intercepted him with his tail and then power-charged the Saiyan. As Frieza sat there, planning his next move, Bardock quickly charged up, but was knocked into the air. Knocked back onto the ground, Bardock powered up some more, however Frieza kept hitting him with a barrage of punches and kicks. No matter how hard he tried, Bardock couldn't avoid Frieza's powerful attacks, getting knocked around by the Psychic Rock Throw attack. Unable to get a hit, the Saiyan kept getting knocked back and forth, unable to get a hit on his nemesis. Holding his arm in pain, Bardock watched helplessly as Frieza powered up. Looking for an opening, Bardock charged forward, but immediately got knocked by Psychic Rock Throw _again_. Still constantly getting beaten around, Bardock fired a ki blast and managed to hit Frieza. Knowing that it would take more than that, Bardock flew in the air in a desperate attempt to heal. Frieza stood there, watching.

"Don't tell me you're _scared_!" Frieza yelled.

"This isn't even my strongest form!" Bardock boasted before charging up yet again. Clearly he had a plan, but he wasn't ready to activate it yet. And as one could see, Frieza was getting impatient.

"ARE YOU DONE YET?" a frustrated Frieza yelled up.

"YES!" Bardock yelled back. Landing, he put on a show; he stood there and yelled at the top of his lungs, and his hair started to gain a golden color. Soon afterwards a golden aura began to glow around him, and Frieza immediately sensed a power spike coming from the Saiyan.

Soon the transformation was complete.

"I've done it, Frieza! I've achieved the form of Super Saiyan!"

"Im-impossible!" Frieza yelled. For years generations of his family had feared the arrival of the legendary Super Saiyan, ever since Frieza's ancestor Chilled was killed by one. Because of this single event every member of Frieza's family, from his father King Cold to his brother Cooler, strived to become stronger and stronger. But this time, it happened. Ready to fight, Frieza pushed Bardock back, laying a few punches on him. And within a few minutes Bardock was being tossed around again by Frieza's powers. Then Bardock really started to fight back, laying several kicks and blasts. Then came the final attack.

"KI ENERGY WAVE!" Bardock yelled as he fired his most powerful attack. Frieza teleported away as the attack blew over the spot he was just in, and appeared right behind Bardock, shooting him with a Death Beam right through the chest. Down Bardock went, trying hard to get a few breaths of air in. As Wolverine got up, he saw the dying warrior struggle to attack. But it was hopeless- Frieza had won. Immediately realizing that they were doomed, Wolverine picked up the sleeping cat and jumped in one of Frieza's pods. Launching it, Wolverine set it to a random location as Frieza finally noticed.

"THEY'RE GETTING AWAY! STOP THEM!" Frieza yelled to his henchmen, but it was too late- they had successfully fled.

"Lord Frieza," a henchman said, "Should we go after them?"

Frieza chuckled and replied, "No. They're weak anyway. Get this waste out of my sight, and continue with your business."

After they all nodded at the same time the henchmen returned to their duties as Frieza returned to his first form.


	6. Chapter 5

THE pod crashed in a dark alley. Stepping out, Garfield took a glance at the scenery.

"What a dump." The cat remarked.

"Is every place a dump to you?" Wolverine commented, glancing at him. The cat shrugged.

"That's really not our problem right now. Our problem is that we're on the run from a galactic tyrant and we're flat out broke. We need money- _fast_."

Garfield pointed to a wall in the alley and said, "Well how about that?"

Looking at the wall, Wolverine found a flyer. Ripping it off, he read it out loud. It said:

TODAY

 **COME DOWN AND SEE IF YOU CAN GO**

 **TOE-TO-TOE IN THE RING AGAINST ONE**

 **OF OUR ATHLETIC SUPERSTARS**

 **WINNERS GET $300!**

"Fights, huh?" Wolverine said, "The more we win the more money we make. Not a bad idea."

"If I'm correct, you regenerate right?"

"…It takes some time depending what the wound is from."

"Punches and kicks?"

"Probably a few seconds, tops."

"Then we can win this, right?"

"Depends on who we're up against."

"Doesn't hurt to try."

"Then let's go."

Garfield slumped down on the ground. Looking up at the warrior, he said, "Carry me."

Groaning, Wolverine picked up the fat orange cat and began the walk to the arena. After several minutes of walking Wolverine finally made it to the arena where the fights were being held. The building was a small wooden temple, probably with seventy-five to maybe a hundred people inside. Walking in, Wolverine got down to business.

"WHICH ONE OF YOU IS THE MANAGER?" he yelled, looking around. A short, thin man in an expensive business suit came up to him.

"That'd be me." He said, pulling out a business card, "I'm Jonas B. Wagner, booker extraordinaire. Now, what can I do for ya?"

"I want in." the mutant replied. Looking him over Jonas deemed him able to fight. Then he looked at Garfield, who was still sleeping in Wolverine's outstretched arms.

"And him?" he asked, pointing to the cat.

"That's my manager." Wolverine calmly replied in his gruff voice.

"Alright, just fill out this application and you can be fighting tonight."

"Fine."

Garfield woke up in a plastic chair. Looking around, he noted that Wolverine was nowhere to be seen. Then the door opened fast, and both Wolverine and a short man walked out. They shook hands and the short man shut the door.

"We're in." Wolverine said.

"Fine." Garfield said.

"Listen, cat: I need you stay up throughout all my fights. You need to be in my corner if we're gonna make it through this."

"Yeah, sure."

"Alright. Fights begin in ten minutes."

"Good."

In the locker room the duo were stared at from all around. Sitting down on a bench, the two had begun to plan a strategy when one of the guys near them spoke up.

"Hey! Pointy mask!" the man called. Wolverine and Garfield turned to see a very tall man. He was African-American, and he wore a basketball outfit. He extended his arm.

"Name's Shaq." He introduced himself, "Shaquille O'Neal."

"Uh…" Wolverine stuttered, reaching his arm out to meet Shaq's, "Logan."

Shaq looked at Garfield. "Who's your friend?"

"Him? He's my manager. His name's Garfield- Garfield Arbuckle."

"Hey!" Garfield intervened, "I never said that was my last name!"

"Well, you're Jon's cat aren't ya?" Shaq asked.

"Y-yeah. I am his cat."

"So, Arbuckle's your last name, since Jon adopted you."

Garfield gave the basketball player a snarl and asked, "How do you know this?"

"Garfield, where I'm from you're a cartoon character. Same goes for Logan over here. He's part of the X-Men."

"Well then." Logan replied, "You were displaced too?"

"Yeah, it was pretty weird. Big flash overtook us and then all of a sudden- POOF! Here I am."

Finishing his sentence, Shaq turned to his locker and took something out of it. Turning back around, he handed Wolverine a big bottle. On it were the words 'Gold Bond'.

"What's this?" Logan grunted.

"It's lotion. Put it on. You're gonna need it."

As the mutant anti-hero applied the cream to his forearms Jonas B. Wagner entered the room. Looking around, he rang a brass bell on the wall. The loud clangs drew everyone's attention to him.

"Alright." Wagner began, "Tonight we begin another show of bravery and action. First two up are… Wolverine and Aang!"

As Wolverine walked out of the locker room he saw his opponent. He was short, probably no younger than 13 or 14, but he had blue arrow tattoos all over him from head to toe. The boy looked confident, but Wolverine was more focused on the fact that he needed to beat this guy to a pulp in order to make some dough. Walking into the room of wood and bamboo the two got on opposite sides of each other. Wagner rang his bell again, commencing the fight.

Wolverine walked up to the kid, but before he could do anything he took a punch to the jaw. Quickly, however, Wolverine overtook the airbender. Soon Aang had finally begun dodging with his magnificent airbending skills, dodging the adamantium claws. Wolverine could feel his healing factor kick in, but then the young boy flung him across the room. After they had each thrown countless blows at each other the bald yet mighty boy fell down, unable to continue against the mutant vigilante. The bell rang, and Wolverine was declared the winner by total knockout.

Wagner walked forward, microphone in one hand, and a piece of paper in the other.

"Wolverine's next opponent is… Perry the Platypus!"

Swiftly a small teal-colored platypus jumped in the fight zone, with the faint sound of backup singers chanting "Perry!" in unison. No one ever questioned where it came from.

Wolverine scanned his new opponent. He thought it was somewhat ridiculous seeing a platypus in a fedora, especially on its hind legs. Wolverine didn't think about this too long, however, because Perry delivered a kick straight to the mutant's scarred face. It stung because of the barbs naturally found in the platypus's anatomy. Wolverine, however, had dealt with poison before, so this was nothing new. Wolverine returned with a tackle, slamming them into the wall. Perry managed to squirm out of a headlock right before the claws sliced him; he had dealt with the fighting styles of Dr. Doofenshmirtz before, and he had even teamed up with the Avengers and Spider-Man once, but Wolverine was a different type of fight. It wasn't whether he won; it was whether he could last long enough to win. And soon, with enough determination, Perry began to outpower the mutant vigilante. Cornered, Logan was lost on what he should do.

 _Use the Gold Bond_ , Shaq's voice somehow resonated in his head. Taking the bottle out of his pocket, Wolverine opened it and splashed the lotion in Perry's eyes. With his opponent blinded, Wolverine took advantage and knocked him down. The bell rang.

"The winner is Wolverine!" Wagner announced. Soon after the crowds began to head home (wherever that may be) and Wolverine walked back into the locker room, where he was immediately greeted by Garfield.

"I saw the whole thing!" he said, "That was crazy!"

"Yeah," Logan grunted, "never underestimating semi-aquatic mammals again."

Noticing Shaq in a corner of the room, Wolverine walked up to him.

"Thanks, Shaq. That lotion really came in handy."

"No problem, man," Shaq said, "but you look a bit beat up. Here, use this."

Shaq handed Wolverine an IcyHot pad. Putting it on his back, Logan felt immediate relief.

"So, uh, any clue where I am?" he asked.

"What?" Wolverine looked at him, a puzzled look on his face.

"All I remember is the big white flash, and then poof! I was here."

"That's the same thing that happened to us!" Garfield said, "We're trying to find our way back!"

"Oh… mind if I join you?" Shaq asked.

"You got any more of those pads and that lotion?" Logan asked.

"Enough to supply an army."

"Fine. You're in."

And so, Shaq joined our band of unlikely heroes on their quest to get to their respective places.


	7. Chapter 6

THE three marched straight into Wagner's office. With his feet up on the desk Wagner took note of the cat, mutant, and basketball player.

"Hello boys," he greeted them, "what can I do for ya?"

"It's time to pay up." Wolverine said, extending his hand.

"So you're leaving?"

"'Fraid so."

"Oh, well, I'm sorry," the fight promoter said as he stood up and walked to the door, "I'm afraid I can't let you do that."

"Oh?" Garfield said, "and why is that?"

"You see boys, I only make so much money. So I promise fighters good pay, only to trap them in my clutches, so that as they maim each other, I make a steady profit. It's a win-win."

"Only for you!" Shaq yelled, "Come on guys. Let's go report him to the authorities."

"Oh, I can't let you do that either. Anyone who snitches gets stitches. Or as I prefer it, they die."

Wagner pressed a button on his desk, and two spriteswaps of Ryu came down.

"Ryu?!" Shaq said in surprise.

"Not Ryu," Wagner corrected, "just clones of him I found in an alley. They work for me now, and they love busting shins. Which is exactly what they're gonna do to you, right boys?"

The Ryus nodded. Shaq pushed Garfield away, as he didn't want the comic icon to get hurt trying to defend himself.

Wolverine jumped in the air only to get kicked back by Ryu-A as Ryu-B struck Shaq with a hadouken. The fight was a mess as Shaq threw Ryu-A while Logan sliced Ryu-B. The mutant and basketball player began to overpower the martial artists, and one of the main points was Shaq making it rain various candy bars on Ryu-B (which Garfield snuck away). Ryu-B was knocked unconscious rather quickly as Ryu-A found himself cornered. He was disposed of rather quickly. The two fighters turned towards the promoter.

"That all you got?" Wolverine grunted.

"Now boys," Wagner said, "we can settle this the easy way or the hard way-"

"It's too late for that."

As the mutant approached the conman Wagner jumped over the desk, grabbed Wolverine, and slammed him through it. Shaq attempted to defend himself, but Wagner knocked the tall athlete down. He, however, did not expect Garfield to claw his face open. In fact, one might say that the fat cat went too far.

As the promoter laid there on the ground bleeding he looked at the three who had revolted.

"Look at what you've done," he said in dire pain, "dozens of fighters… with no income… thanks to you…"

"You wouldn't have given them the money anyway." Shaq pointed out.

"You… just made… a mistake…"

"Shut it." Wolverine said, stabbing the conman right in the throat. The three went silent for a moment.

"Wasn't that a little too far?" Garfield asked.

"… Maybe. Now, grab the money and start giving it to people."

After everyone had gotten their backpay, the three found themselves with about $1750. Putting it in his pocket, Shaq mentioned that they should probably go out and find some way to fix the mess that was this galaxy.

"The whole galaxy?!" Garfield said, "That's going to be impossible!"

"You want to see Jon again, don't you?"

Garfield nodded, and with that our heroes went off onto the next point in their adventure.

Now, these three don't know it, and you won't know how until I tell you, but they are going to change everything as we know it through not just their actions, but mostly through what they find.


End file.
